The Confidence Coach

Your Triple 'A' Rating

Mon, 21 May 2012 20:38:00 GMT

A Triple 'A' Attitude

When your mission statement reads, "I plan to live till 100 (and more) to be happy, healthy, wealthy and wise; to help other people achieve the same and have lots of fun along the way;" then you have a plan to work and you have to work that plan. Do you have a personal mission statement? It's not just something for corporate companies and organisations you know. And if like me, you have made many trips around the sun, you need something to help you focus as tempus fugit!

The Healthy Option

At 06.40 each morning Monday to Friday I walk 2 miles. I cycle regularly and chart my progress on Runkeeper. The important thing is accountability. Why not do similar? It really kick starts your day. However, if smart phones are not your thing, find a walking buddy or a dog as they're just as effective. Would you like to join my international 'Street Team', simply download Runkeeper - it's free - and find me there as eilidh1 - we can encourage each other and I'd appreciate your support. Two months ago, I gave up caffeine drinks and wine is a treat kept for weekends. In themselves each of these acts is just a small behavioural change, however taken together they form a much healthier lifestyle. What can you do today to make a change for the better in your life?

Money Matters plus a Bonus!

When is comes to keeping your personal funds in order you might need help. If you want to get your financial future into great shape you can start right now. My friend Robert Bauman’s new book 'Straight Money Talk – A Straightforward Plan for Financial Independence' has just been published. Click this link to get your copy now.

My Cool Beans Desktop says, "Money is a tool..." apply this simple money principle coupled with Robert's strategies and you too can learn to be a craftsman. When you buy the book, you will be taken to a bonus page with lots of fab free materials to download from experts such as Bob Proctor, Jack Canfield and Keith Leon ... and the editor of TCI.

Happiness = A Triple 'A' Attitude

Money and digits lead perfectly to this link. Enjoy the magic of mathematics. and figure out what 100% or 101% means to you? Develop your personal triple 'A' rating. Live your life with a passion and on purpose; a life lived by design and not by accident. And if the something happens, if something falls over (like one of those scrabble tiles above) perhaps your health, wealth or happiness, then concentrate on the things are working well in your life. We all have 'life attacks...' and as you know... and it's not what happens that counts it's how you react.

To Your Success!

Discover more:
Professional coaching Confidence coaching sees proven results...
An empowerment speaker You'll love the difference...
A workshop facilitator What are your needs? Can we help?

Pass it on: This information TCI may be freely re-used in any online or offline publication, provided it is accompanied by the following credit line - "This information was written by Eilidh Milnes. It originally appeared in "Talk Confidence International" her free e-letter, available at www.eilidhmilnes.com." Thank you.

Vitamins for the Mind

Wed, 09 May 2012 19:16:00 GMT

Powerful Pictures

This edition includes a Ted Talk with breathtaking images. Enjoy Louie Schwartzberg's Happiness Revealed. It's thanks to reader Edna Lawton who told me, "I'm so glad that I watched this video. It is truly inspirational."

The Film Maker's Challenge

Take up Louie's challenge i.e. to bless someone with your eyes... your touch... your smile... simply with your presence today. The footage is compelling. I'm confident you'll enjoy it. So I'll keeping this edition short and sweet to give your more time click the link. However keen readers can read more with a story called "86,400 seconds."

Eilidh in the North-East

Another subscriber Linda Russell-Bond requested my last charity talk for 2012. It turns out that she and I have never actually met. Here's the thin thread that connects us:

Linda bought my book "... The Happiness Curriculum for Teachers,"
That was several years ago,
At that point Linda signed up for these ezines,
She has been receiving them ever since,
She describes them as her "vitamins for the mind!"

Linda has booked me to speak in Stockton-on-Tees on 18th October and I can't wait to meet this loyal subscriber and raise money for a worthy cause. If you want to know more, drop me a line.

Keep taking your vitamins!

Till next time,

Ever Positive, Eilidh

Pushing your luck

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 16:49:00 GMT

Drilling your brain?

Years ago as a young student, I joined the GSUOTC (that's the Glasgow & Strathclyde Universities Officers' Training Corps for the uninitiated) thanks to my good friend and flat mate Barbara Robertson. She was insistent! Drilling me with all sorts of reasons as to why we should sign up - it'll be fun, they'll teach us how to sail... ski... shoot! And they'll pay us for the priviledge. Now its got nothing to do with my Scottish thriftiness or that money motivated me, however as a poor student it was a huge attraction and benefit. Strangely though Barbara's invitation to join, led me to one of the biggest landmarks in my life - I met Jay, my ski instructor and future husband when we went on a "winter warfare course" cleverly disguised as a skiing trip to Aviemore!

Fortune will Favour you if you Push your Luck

Is someone digging at you to take action? If so, it's important that you associate and take advice from people you know, like and trust. Media and PR expert Alan Stevens asked me to be a guest blogger on Managing Reputation. Because he is a respected colleague and friend with a blog that has a wide reach and appeal, I gladly accepted. Enjoy the link to the story about "Pushing your Luck." It is true that fortune will favour you if you push your luck, in the right way and for the right reasons...

Nearly all booked for 2012

As many of you know, I deliver one free charity talk each month. I'm all booked up for this year apart from October. So if you live in UK and have a worthy cause that you would like me to support, then drop me a line. May's charity is The Joshua Tree. This event is SOLD OUT with a waiting list. And today's great news is that Joshua now 13, is in remission and has been selected to carry the Olympic Torch on May 30th! There can be no doubt that when he was going through his treatments Joshua must have had negative thoughts drilling into his brain, but being a young hero he fights on. And I am thrilled to be able to help raise funds.

The Final Ticket!

The charity allocated me a second ticket. I'd like to donate that back. If you wish to claim this last seat then mail or call me on 07876 786 784 today. The price is just £20.00, you'll sit at my table and we are guaranteed a lovely meal at the luxury Nunsmere Hall Hotel.

The IT Challenge

Did you learn new computer shortcuts since the last edition of TCI? If you need the links again here they are: Macs and Windows.
Enjoy a super fortnight and keep pushing your luck!

Happy thoughts, confidence builders and fun stuff, Eilidhism

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 09:49:00 GMT

Walk With Me As I Get Older

I hope this poem has the same effect on you as it did on me - then my forwarding it will be worth the effort. Walk with me by the water - worth the read...

A BEAUTIFUL POEM ABOUT GROWING OLDER:

You're going to have to imagine the scene cos I can't find the picture and...

S***, I forgot the words!

How to Network with Strangers - Travelling Companions - Making New Friends

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 10:26:00 GMT

Take time to enjoy the company of others

A Cultural Exchange
As the stranger put on her hat, I smiled saying “Sehr hübsch!” And the stranger smiled back, happy with the compliment. “Vielen Dank,” she replied with a laugh.

“Are you going to the airport?” she added in English.” If so you’re on the wrong section of the train; you need to be in the rear carriages…”

Now we’d just spent a fabulous day exploring Munich then met friends for a final treat of German hospitality – great wine, beer and a Bavarian specialty – pork shank. We were running on a very tight schedule to make our connection and had forgotten that the airport train divided! We got to the flight check-in with just 10 minutes to spare and in my book that is too close for comfort. Fortunately as frequent fliers we had little luggage, all our documents to hand and armed with magic smiles and politeness we moved speedily through security.

What is your MO?
Travelling the globe as I do, I’m constantly reminded of how kind and helpful people are; as it is really thanks to the lady with the hat and to my ability to communicate with confidence that we made our return flight to UK. That chance chit chat guaranteed that we made our flight on time; it kind of stopped the clock…

People work with different time scales and methods, you also have cultural and age related differences. Generation Y for example tends to work very much more up to the wire. Perhaps for them it is part of the fun and an adrenalin kick. For me, last minute it is verging on stressful and does not allow for the unforeseen. I wonder what your preferred modus operandi is... Whichever method suits you better, I wish you well on your travels through 2012. In the meantime...

Tips for an memorable year:

Allow regular time to savour the company of others,
Schedule farewell meals, business buffets and sip something special with people whose company inspires you,
And factor in extra time for serendipitous conversations with strangers. It could make all the difference…

Bon Voyage!

Eilidh

CV & Confidence Tips, Changing Jobs & Redundancy Risks

Tue, 10 Apr 2012 19:47:00 GMT

Time to review your CV/Resume? Ten Red-Hot Tips

There are a lot of unemployed people out there. If the market far exceeds demand, how do you make sure you get past the resume screening process into the interviewing round? By making sure your CV is flawless. 95 to 99% of resumes and CVs can be trimmed. The general rule is if you put anything on there that distracts the reader from your real accomplishments, then delete it. Resumes need to be concise. Here are the latest hot tips to make sure your resume avoids being trashed. They may question how you currently create your CV:

1. Review your objective:

If you applied, it's already obvious you want the job, so any objective must be a punchy one liner.

2. Cut out all irrelevant work experiences

If you're still listing that prized position from your school days, it's time to move on! Time to de-clutter.

3. Remove personal stuff e.g. marital status

This might've been the standard in the past, but much information is now illegal for your employer to ask you so there's no need to include it. It will likely hinder than help.

4. One page please

Yes, this might be difficult if you've had a lot of experience and you're proud of it. Proud doesn't necessarily mean relevant. Cut it down; employers don't have the time to read page after page.

Put what is most important first,
Keep your work history short and to the point,
Describe what you have achieved while in the position,
List in bullet form.

5. Latest on hobbies

It's not your Facebook profile; future employers are not your friends, so it's unlikely that your hobbies will interest them. Don't put anything on your resume or CV that's irrelevant to the job. If it's not relevant, then it's a waste of space and a waste of the reader's time.

6. Don't give them the chance to guess your age

If you don't want to be discriminated from a position because of your age, it's time to remove your education dates. Take out higher education if it's irrelevant to the position you're applying for, or if you keep receiving rejection because you're overqualified.

7. Write your resume in the first person

Write your opening statement in first person. You should not write in the third person - the recruiter of HR manager knows you're the one writing the resume.
The rest of your resume should then be in bulleted for ease and speed of reading:

Scheduled deployments, improvements and hot-fixes.
Delivered implementation of SEO strategies.

8. References are not required

If your employers want to speak to your referees, they'll ask. Include "references upon request" at the bottom of your resume, only if you're needing to fill a page. Better to include something more valuable. Remember you have just one page so max-out each line!

9. Field a professional email account

Make a new one. It takes minutes. It's free.

10. Your contact details

Is there a point in putting the word "phone" in front of the actual number? Recruiters know it's your phone number. The same applies to email doesn't it? Cut out the fluff. Don't distract a speed reader who will most likely or reject your CV/Resume within 10 seconds...

Finally, do you really want employers calling you at work? How are you going to handle that? Your current employer can monitor your e-mails and phone calls. So avoid getting fired before you are ready to move on and leave off your present business contact details. Time to get trimming!

Eilidh

The sandpit of life...

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 06:55:00 GMT

Learn life's shortcuts

At the turn of the millennium, I wasn't so confident with computers and perhaps you feel this way even now. I never anticipated having the skills to build my own web pages, repair broken code or master social media. Back then, Kyle was starting his IT business and living at home. He encouraged me to have a go with the 'black art of technology!'

"...Remember when I was a wee boy and we went to the beach? In a matter of seconds I could lay waste to perfect print-free sand by charging around barefoot. Well, with old operating systems you could do serious damage to your data in a similar fashion. But nowadays with the latest software programmes the most you could do is knock over a bucket of sand! So go and play on the big, beautiful beach of IT; safe in the knowledge that you really can't damage anything that I can't fix!"

The iPad Video

The video is a great example of how technology is evolving faster than the minds of many. The secret is not to be afraid and to have a go - but not without reading the manual or seeking advice first!

Learn the shortcuts

If you have a confidence issue, take heart from Kyle's clever analogy. In 2000, I was so nervous I could hardly switch on (or off) the computer. I had convinced myself that I was going to break or irretrievably damage files.... yet look at me now! I may never be a programming expert, however, I can do a lot more than I ever dreamed possible a decade ago! Of course, when I need help I take advice from experts such as Kyle, now an outstanding web technologist or the gurus at the Apple Store.

Confidence Plus

Have I made mistakes? You bet! Am I bothered? Well generally... no. What's really amazing is that the confidence you gain in one area of your life, can be replicated in others, just like a shortcut e.g. if you had told me ten years ago that I'd be planning my third speaking tour in Australia and sponsoring the Flair Awards, I would have thought you mad! Me? Working on the other side of the world? Are you crazy? Yet I am! So what is stopping you... surely if I can, you can. A great read is on page 7 here: What's Stopping You?

Create you own sandpit

Wouldn't it be great, if we could use short cuts such as Control+ z (or Command + z on Macs) to undo mistakes? My website has a 'Rollback.' This feature allows you to revert to a previous version. Wouldn't it be fantastic if we had this ability in life? Perhaps there is something you wish you had... or hadn't... done? Is something is stopping you from reaching your potential? Take positive steps today, create shortcuts - rollback into the sandpit of life. The thing we call a mistake or a failure is not the falling down but the staying down, so roll over and start afresh.

An IT Challenge

If you don't currently know or use computer computer shortcuts learn and use three (or three more) till the next edition of TCI. Keyboard shorts for Macs and Windows.

As always, Eilidh

Discover more:
Professional coaching Confidence coaching sees proven results...
An empowerment speaker You'll love the difference...
A workshop facilitator What are your needs? Can we help?

The Excuse Cycle

Wed, 28 Mar 2012 13:29:00 GMT

The Excuse Cycle

The most popular link on the last edition, was my Expert Presentation Tips. In fact, this Pdf was downloaded hundreds of times, which goes to prove that speaking in public continues to be a cause for concern. It is said that 80% of people would rather go to bed with snakes and spiders than speak in public!

Being able to communicate well, unlocks your potential and increases your productivity. And the most important conversations you have every day, are the ones you have with yourself. Proper self-talk will propel you to a more exciting, brighter and fulfilling future.

Fear? False Expectations Appearing Real...

It all starts between your ears. The anacronym for FEAR came to mind as I read a follower's Facebook post. She was praising Susan Jeffer's book, "Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway." Have you read it? If not, click the link and review "Feel the Fear..." and others. The books are inspirational and self-help. Treat yourself to a copy or two now.

Spot #2

The second Facebook find was this motivational video by Samuel L Jackson. Take just one minute of your time to watch Jackson's - "Blame!" It's a powerful presentation, which I'm tempted to rename "The Excuse Cycle." Essentially it's about gun culture, however in my opinion the excuses Jackson gives are just as relevant to self-doubt. One reason is enough, one reason is as good as another -one excuse, any reason - rather than doing what needs to be done. Read more.

Some Practical Ideas

If you do find youself in the cycle of excuses - "It's my mum's fault..." "Dad didn't encourage me..." "People like me don't... can't... won't do that...." then you need to take action. Today! Use my WoW Process to keep you focused. Don't wait. No-one is promised the page on the planner marked tomorrow.

Spot #3

The final link is thanks to Ali Meehan who Tweeted a challenge on 3Plus International - Women Worth Knowing. I thought the contest worthy. Let's face it you can do anything for 10 days! Read how an App. helped me chart my success. Today is day 14! I'm feeling exceptionally good about myself. I am chasing my targets, my waistline is slimmer and more of my wardrobe fits!

Factoid

Did you know that most people only wear 20% of their wardrobe 80% of the time? A staggering yet factual statistic. The venerable 80-20 Pareto rule applies: we wear 20% of our clothing 80% of the time, while the remaining 80% represent the freeloaders of the wardrobe clan!

Don't Be a Freeloader

Cast out the doubts - treat yourself like a VIP - A Premiere Client. Don't be a freeloader in your own life. Just do a little - and do it often. Find a way of monitoring your success, such as my WoW programme, an App. or a spreadsheet and celebrate every success along the way!

Enjoyed this ezine?
If you have an idea to share, do mail or call, I'd love to hear from you. To post on social networks - simply use these AddThis icons. And finally, are we connected on LinkedIn?

Discover more:

An empowerment speaker You'll love the difference...

Pass it on: The information in TCI may be freely re-used in any online or offline publication, provided it is accompanied by the following credit line - "This information was written by Eilidh Milnes. It originally appeared in "Talk Confidence International" her free e-letter, available at www.eilidhmilnes.com." Thank you.

Educators/Education/ Information/Ideas

Mon, 19 Mar 2012 08:39:00 GMT

How to Prepare for Parents' Evenings

A teacher's workload can be staggering; coursework, lesson plans, reports, after-school clubs all vie for your time. Then in addition a parents’ evening pops up, to fill yet another of your evenings. They are part of the statutory framework, so if you have to be there, you may as well ensure this is an evening well spent. Follow these simple steps to ensure your time is productive, stress-free and effective.

As with most things, preparation and planning promise a perfect performance… have these 5 ‘P’ points at the forefront of your mind.

1. Prepare Thoroughly

Each parent is going to be concerned about his or her child. "What grade are they working at?" "How is the child's behaviour?" "Is the homework up to scratch?" Each parent expects you to be an expert on his/her child. If you were working in business, the parents would be your key client base, so treat them like first class customers - treat each parent the way he or she wants to be treated.

Just as you expect your pupils to prepare thoroughly for exams, you need do the same for any meeting with parents. Send a warm, friendly professional note to each family to encourage them to attend the meeting. For many reasons not the least an environmental one, send as many letters electronically as possible. Invite a dialogue prior to the date so that you can flag any possible problems. On the day, the following checklist could be your starting point:

1. Note every child's name with target grades, working at grades and latest test results,

2. Attendance records,

3. Quality of homework and hand-in rate,

4. Queries on learning issues,

5. Examples of pupils work – leave parents to browse these post the meeting,

6. Any behaviour issues.

2. Look After Yourself First

1. Prior to the event, make sure you are properly fed and watered. Check your appearance, brush your teeth/hair.

2. Collect all your notes and have your desk prepared well before the event starts - particularly important if you are working away from you class or form room. Preparation will prevent a last minute rush and give a good impression.

3. Ensure you have water to sip throughout. You need to keep your throat lubricated. Water is the best way to stay hydrated and alert. It also keeps your breath fresher than caffeine drinks.

4. If necessary schedule a break where you can stand up - aim to get some fresh air.

3. Positivity Makes a Difference

1. Accentuate the positive,

2. Start and end with two positive comments - what I call my 'feedback sandwich.'

3. Give any negative comments in light of the child's achievements,

4. Use hard facts to back up anything negative,

5. Ensure the parents realise that you have their child's best interests at heart.

If there happens to be an issue with a pupil, parents evening should never be the first time parents hear about it - particularly if this has been an ongoing issue. Do the groundwork - follow school protocol and contact home first. Be positive yet don't shy away from what needs to be said.

4. Remember your ABCs

Always Be Calm - Particularly true when dealing with over-zealous, over-ambitious or pushy parents. You are not present to be abused. If at any time you feel unsafe, threatened, demeaned or overwhelmed call for a senior member of staff immediately. If confronted, stay calm. You are the professional; they are a parent trying to defend their child. Understandable? Yes. Aggressive behaviour condonable? No.

I run courses on how to deal with difficult people and situations. Do pass this information to the member of staff who deals with training in your organisation. www.eilidhmilnes.com/communicationsconsulant I'd be delighted to look at the possibility of working in your establishment.

5. Keep to Time

Nothing annoys a parent more than waiting for a teacher who has over-run on time. Stick rigidly to your allocated appointments. To give you the best chance of sticking to these, outline to each parent your meeting plan i.e.

"I thought we should start with the current progress (positive statements), how they are doing against their targets, and then outline some areas for development" Then rattle through them. Allow time for any queries or concerns the parent may have. If you are reaching the end of your slot but the (useful) conversation appears to be ploughing on you have a number of options:

Ask for contact details (phone, email) and a time where these issues can be discussed in full,
Ask for the parents to make another appointment where this can be resolved,
Write down three action points and promise to begin with these. Get parent buy-in to your actions.
Direct the parent to a more senior colleague.

To signal the end of an appointment, it's a good idea to put the lid on your pen, tidy your files and stand up with a smile. Explain that time has flown by. If they do not appear to be moving, offer one of the points listed 1-4 above. Make it clear you are taking their concerns seriously and thank the parents (or guardians) for taking time to attend the meeting.

Bonus Points

Hopefully, the above ideas will result in you having a successful meeting with parents that is productive and stress free. There are one or two general things you can do to make sure these evenings are well worth the price you pay in time:

Follow up parental requests/inquiries,
Listen to parents,
Do not allow parents to upset you,
Listen to pupils,
Look at things from the parent’s perspective (Is this the 6th consecutive poor report about an 'angelic child’?) How would you feel in such circumstances?
In the week of the parents evening, make your life easier. Plan revision lessons or tests that can be peer-assessed.
Keep any negative comments in balance. Some parents have unrealistic expectations. At the end of the event and in the weeks that follow, focus on the fact that the largest percentage of your parents are very happy, appreciative and supportive.
Buddy up with a positive colleague.

'Love your Life...Survive the System'

A tool for teachers to gain control of their lives - A happiness curriculum...

Enjoy Parents' Evenings!

End Smiling :)

Eilidh

TES Teaching Resources

Think Things Done

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 21:08:00 GMT

When your brain is in a vice...

"Chill yer beans ma," said Kyle.(roughly translated from young people speak to 'calm down mother!') "Think things done!" And so I did... There I was getting myself in a lather because I did not have time to review my final checklist. I don't know about you, but I'm a fan of lists and when it comes to preparing for a speaking engagement my final checklist is like a security blanket. Taking time to do the final checks gives me peace of mind, reassurance and of course more confidence. (More speaking and presentation tips here.)

Behind schedule

However I was running behind schedule (notice I did not say, I was 'late!') and beginning to feel a tad overwhelmed by all that still had to be done, when Kyle shared his wisdom, "think things done..." And you know... it worked. I was fussing over nothing. I did have all my materials. The cases were packed and in the car. I knew where I was going. "Alles in Ordenung," as my German readers would say.

Think things done - TTD!

Isn't it strange how we like to pressure our brains, to put them in a vice and then seem genuinely surprised when we feel discombobulated? Have you felt out of control recently? Have you had:

A deadline looming?
A presentation to work up?
A special menu to finalise?

Well that is the time to apply the TTD principle and chill yer beans :)

And it all went well

Some of you might be thinking, where's the proof? How do we know it all worked out well? Take a look at the evalution and feedback here. Thanks to Chris Davidson and Kyle for tweaking our spreadsheets! I thought about things... and they got them done... well that's another way of approaching a problem isn't it? (I'm looking for the smiley with a slightly evil grin, but can't spot it...I'm sure you can use your imagination.)

More links and likes

You've asked me to included these links again. Ants Crabs Penguins. Some readers have actually mailed to state their favourites. Thank you!

ITV needs you!

I've been contacted by Sheree Gordon of ITV. The programme "Come Dine With Me" is looking for people to take part in the show... so if you are in Cheshire, UK and this appeals to you...Bon appetit! Read More!

Thinking things done, Eilidh

Professional Speaking Association (PSA)

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 08:00:00 GMT

Collaboration Live! London April 14th 2012

Dear Friends,

See you all there - new members, exiting members and guests who just want to get better...

Remember the quality of the information at this Collaboration Live event will help you in whatever business you are in. Speaking, presenting internally, self image, promoting and regular business skills

The speakers are awesome and there will be several multi-millionaire business people attending - just to pick up even more tips

Have a great week - and to book on go to the link or just let me know and I will fix it for you. Nothing is too much trouble for the PSA.

Derek

Derek Arden
www.derekarden.com

07980 241185

President of the Professional Speaking Association of the United Kingdom

Author Broadcaster and Business Mentor

Happy thoughts, confidence builders and fun stuff, Eilidhism

Tue, 13 Mar 2012 17:11:00 GMT

Would you be interested in 'Come Dine with Me in CREWE & NANTWICH'. If so, we would love to hear more from anyone who wishes to apply.

If you wish an application form, just mail: Sheree.Gordon@itv.com. Or call me direct for a chat on 02071574969 Thank you.

Please fill out the form and return it to me as soon as you can, as casting closes at the end of this week.

Successful applicants will need to be available for our shoot dates are 1^st – 6^th April. During this time you would need to be available for an hour in the daytime and then from about 16.30 onwards on the 4 nights that you will attend dinner parties as a guest. You would then need to be available for the entire day that you will host your own party. (This day will be confirmed 1 week before the shoot).

We do strongly advise that you take the whole week off work if possible but this is not compulsory.

We’re looking forward to receiving your application and speaking to you soon.

Many Thanks,

Sheree

Sheree.Gordon@itv.com

LinkedIn Tips for Teenagers - Young people speak out with confidence

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 13:01:00 GMT

Stand & Deliver: Press Release - Courtesy of Kelly Cowley Sir William Stanier:

Students from Crewe high schools’ Sir William Stanier, Ruskin, Kings Grove, and St Thomas Moore were brought together on Thursday 8^th March at Crewe Town Hall for an intensive all day workshop with acclaimed confidence coach, Eilidh Milnes, who had generously volunteered her services in order to inspire young people in the Crewe community.

The day consisted of a variety exercises and activities designed to help the participating students gain confidence in effective public speaking. The highlight of the day was the ‘Stand & Deliver!’ competition where students had the opportunity to give a two minute presentation to the rest of the group on a topic of their choice.

“What a great group of presenters the Crewe Schools turned out to be!” Eilidh enthused after the speeches were delivered. “I was excited to work with them – I just didn't realise how enthusiastic they'd all be! What stars! Three words I’d associate with these students? 1. Friendly 2. Enthusiastic and 3. Eager. They made my job a joy.”

Eilidh opened her workshop informing the twenty students in attendance that people who are articulate and communicate well earn 81% more than people who don’t. The students took up the challenge to improve their confidence and presentation skills, each giving two minute speeches on subjects as diverse as bullying, alcoholism, life saving, body image and various aspects of popular youth culture. Judges struggled to name a winner with such excellent delegates from every participating school. Eventually Nassim Ahmed from Ruskin High School was named ‘Best Presenter’ (winning a £50 cash prize!) and Connor Smith from St Thomas Moore School was named ‘Most Improved’.

“I’m feeling a bit shocked,” said Nassim, shortly after his victory was announced. “I woke up this morning thinking that I wouldn’t win anything. But when I got on stage the confidence came to me. It struck me that you need to stand on your own two feet rather than on someone else’s shoulders. Eilidh taught me well!”

Eilidh

Words Fail... See Pictures

Wed, 29 Feb 2012 11:31:00 GMT

It's said a picture portrays a thousand words and looking at the video clip above, you'll see how I've been feeling recently. As a girl who speaks for a living it's not often that I'm lost for words however, this month has been a challenge on several fronts. On a number of occasions I've been at a loss to know what to say. I can hear you chucking, yes... me! Clients, family and colleagues have confounded me at times. Does this sound familiar to you? Most people are stunned to silence at some point - even a professional speaker.

People don't do things against you - they just do things for themselves...

If you experience feelings of dismay or disbelief, it's important to remember that people seldom go out of their way to upset you personally. They're much more likely to be following their own personal interests. Let me expand with this driving scenario; if a car pulls out in front of you, don't be tempted to shout out, gesticulate and think; "Why did he (or she) do that to me?" Let's face it, the motorist did not linger in that side road and pull out at precisely the moment you drove by! The driver was just acting on his (or her) own behalf. Watch what people do as opposed to what they say when you are confused by situations. Actions do speak louder than words.

Don't Give People Permission To Upset You! (Read more)

During my time as the external trainer for Cheshire Police, I delivered hundreds of "How to Deal with Difficult People" workshops. Want to know the top takeaway? This picture says it all - and more.

Just for fun

Another powerful picture is this one of disbelief.

Why versus what

If you don't know why you do what you do, then take 15 minutes to watch this Ted Talk footage, in which Simon Sinek explains his Golden Circle Theory; i.e. that people don't buy what you do, they buy why you do it. Listen out at 13.03 as Sinek supports my theory. He has a different analogy to prove that people do things for themselves.

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Happy thoughts, confidence builders and fun stuff, Eilidhism

Tue, 21 Feb 2012 19:29:00 GMT

What is success? Was the topic a conversation with a coaching client recently. Prompted me to seek out this Ralph Waldo Emerson poem:

What is Success?

"To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people

And the affection of children,

To earn the appreciation of honest critics

And endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others,

To leave the world a bit better

Whether by a health child, a garden patch,

Or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier

Because you lived.

This is to have succeeded..."

Eilidh

The Confidence Coach

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